Enjoying every aspect of marriage 04/03/01

My deepest, most heartfelt thanks to Michael David, who forwarded me copies of Mom's postings which I can't find but which he (bless him!!) had archived. Many will be out of order, but who cares! ELM

(the following was apparently in response to someone's posting on the Caritas dist list)

From: Mindwalker
To: Caritas
Date: April 3, 2001

I, for one, had quite a few friends who also felt, as I did, that "on a physical level, marriage could be every bit as pleasurable as it could be emotionallly gratifying and spiritually delightful."

It might surprise you to know that there were many women of my generation who considered the physical aspect as a foundation of the others and who considered the marriage bed a place of joy. Of course, there were many - in all religions - who believed they should "close their eyes and think of England."

Here is a thought for you - what about people who believe that there is not any sex in heaven? That stumps me. Some of the same people who feel superior to people in other religions for believing that people are neither married nor given in marriage in heaven can also then turn around and blather on about sex being of this earth only.

Fie and shame - sex is about conjunction and the delights of conjunction. No orgasm in the other world? This Grammie begs to differ, which is the reason my family has instructions that when I am reunited with Pete, the female spouses are to go out and buy black peignoirs and "think of Mom and Dad together again." (after mom reunited with her own true love, i came across a strawbridge's lingerie box in her closet with my name on it - inside was a beautiful black negligee - elm)

I, too, would love to have the truth declared - through words and adult actions - that "one reason to reserve sex for righteous marriage is that with a partner you love and trust, sex is spectacular."

On a deeper, infinitely more important level, by not doing what they both want (and if they do not, then I would be a bit worried), a couple put something outside of both of themselves, above what they want, for the sake of the relationship.

That mutual sacrifice (and both Pete and I had a tough go of not forging ahead full steam before our wedding night – but we did) can make for a strong foundation for marriage. Acknowledging that yes, we wanted to zoom pass "Go" and have intercourse. Yes, intercourse is a rousing experience, pleasurable beyond words. Yes, it should be protected because by waiting ~ with a wholesome mindset ~it can become the concrete of that strong foundation.

What do you think about waiting for marriage to have intercourse? What is the reason for being for sex? Is it an ideal that is worth embracing? What do you believe the Writings teach about pre- or extra-marital sex?

This Gramster is interested in hearing - reply to all or reply to me - what you think. Personally, I cannot make hide nor hair of what people think these days, let alone are sharing with their children.

Thank you - KRL